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The Beast and the Flood.

'There's a growing evidence for the concept of an oscillating universe,based on a recurring event in west yorkshire.Every six months or so, a kid on a housing estate climbs over a wall to retrieve a football, and is savaged by a dangerous dog. Look North dispatch a film crew to the scene of the crime, to interview the grieving parents and the owner of the dog,usually through a ....letterbox. A dog breeder then testifies to the gentleness of the breed as a whole,and the piece concludes with news of the destruction of the offending animals.Details vary,but essential all the incidents of this type are the same' - Simon Armitage

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wise words from the wise men